Private Messages :)
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Posted:Mar 11, 2011 11:15 pm
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2020 4:23 am
15831 Views
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For all the folks who have something to say but it is to be
For
My
Eyes
Only..... 
Go on, then... go on.... you know you wanna... 
Have a great day, folks! 
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, 3 Pending
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Who am I looking for?
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Posted:May 8, 2018 11:35 pm
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2024 8:45 pm
2454 Views
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Not required:
- poor attitude -- things can go awry, and they sometimes will, and a positive attitude will always have my attention and support.....
- poor manners -- courtesy is under-rated.....
- poor communication skills - I've sometimes had better conversations in sign language, lol..... I love intellectually-charged conversations with Ph.Ds and Masters degree holders, and I also get a kick out of conversing with my neighborhood watchman....
- stay-at-home sugar babies when they could be having a job -- I'm just afraid of being put on rotation, or worse still is when the girl turns out be way more materialistic than I'd like her to be....
- clingy -- there are many levels of clingy, right? The more clingy, the less self-confident, yes? That is not attractive to me, sorry.
- dependent -- I've worked hard, and I work hard, to make my life comfortable, why would I expect anything less in a partner?
- one night stands for money -- sorry, something within me just cannot see how that would work. I've tried it, so I know it's not for me....
I'm not stingy, nor a skin-flint, nor am I not chivalrous. I'm careful with my money and where I spend it, just like how Id expect my girl to be.
She realizes that her education has shaped her character and her conversations, but even is she does not have degrees she knows she can make intelligent conversations. She is curious. She has enthusiasm.
She has a job, one which utilises her brains and time. Keeps her active.
Am I asking too much? Nope. All my girls have been exactly this. So I know there must be many many more like this in our world.
And the search turns me on...... lol..... 
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Available, once again...... lol....
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Posted:May 8, 2018 11:05 pm
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2024 8:45 pm
2492 Views
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It's been said that it helps to put pen to paper.....
Another relationship has ended. She's g overseas for her graduate degree.
This time a relationship lasted just over 2 years. Never had so short before, but it was an awesome time while it lasted.
Was it good for her too? Well, she said yes. We talked about this when her Uni confirmed her place. I did not think it wise to have long-distance commitment. She's young, pretty, and I know I'd be going crazy missing her company in and out of bed, and she would have a lot of opportunities to meet new people there too.
So, yes, tears aplenty from both of us, we'll keep in touch for sure, and perhaps hook up again in the future when she returns.
Till then, I guess it's emails, and facetime etc etc.
Truthfully, I miss her already......
We both knew that this "fling" would be just about 2 while she completed her first job out of Uni as she needed the job experience for her masters. And I was thinking, why not?
I've realised that I do love to pleasure my woman. Be it non-bed stuff, like cooking meals, washing the dishes, snuggling on the sofa watching tv, holding hands on walks, etc.
On the bed, going down on her gives me immense satisfaction to know that her pleasure is evidenced by her moans and sharp intakes of breath. That she is enjoying my tongue and lips. That turns me on too; perhaps a bit more now that I'm older?
It's always a turn on for both of us to shower together especially before making love. That freshly washed skin with its sweet smells - simply fuels my desires..... The kinky side of her had us making love in the usual out-of-bed places too. Swimming pools, cinemas, car parks, stairwells, and other such places where private moments could be stolen to feed our lust.
Beautiful beautiful memories.....
I wonder how my next girl would be like. I've been fortunate till date to have met fine women and girls with amazing personalities and attitudes, and I know the next will not just be the same in that way, but she'll bring her own version of love and flavor to the mix.
So, here's to you, my future girlfriend......
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The Game?
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Posted:Feb 1, 2016 3:34 am
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2024 8:45 pm
7320 Views
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I don't think I was ever in the game at all...........
In a way, I've never had a chance to play the field, as it were. No sowing of oats here and there. Never had any girlfriends when I was in high school or college. I was the geeky overweight nerdy loner. Didn't know how to interact with the fairer sex in college coz I was in a all-boys school throughout till then. They thrilled and sexcited me alright, but my tongue became paralysed when a fine syt found herself next to me. Ha ha ha.....
Somehow in my twenties and thirties, each girl was with me for eight to twelve years each. And I didn't even stray, not even once.
Now that I'm looking again, I find myself asking if it would have benefited me more if I had more partners rather than settle? I didn't have any "rebound" girls, in the sense that all whom I had stayed a long time. Never did have a single girlfriend who was with me for just a couple of weeks or months.
So, yeah, I still find myself craving, yeah let's just say it out - a fine young woman to make love to and sleep with and do stuff with, and especially one who would reciprocate my feelings and take care of me exclusively as I would her.
Being in this part of the world, and with my crazy work hours, it doesn't seem to me that a syt would be willing to work round my schedule. No, I haven't really put myself out there as yet, so I can't really say for sure - it's my evil pessimistic part of me being its usual no-confidence prik... Ha ha ha....
Another thought running in my head I somehow feel a bit weird when I think I'm gonna be put on rotation by a potential girl. I think it would freak me out if it turns out I were to be one of a few guys she might be sleeping with. How do I spot that? And am I out of line to be thinking like that? From what I've seen so far, the girls here do have quite a number of admirers each!
I think my lack of confidence is showing up again... ha ha ha.....
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Jealous by Labrinth..... Just how jealous should one be.......
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Posted:Jan 26, 2016 3:42 am
Last Updated:Jan 26, 2016 3:43 am
7022 Views
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"Jealous"
I'm jealous of the rain
That falls upon your skin
It's closer than my hands have been
I'm jealous of the rain
I'm jealous of the wind
That ripple through your clothes
It's closer than your shadow
Oh, I'm jealous of the wind, cause
[Chorus:]
I wished you the best of
All this world could give
And I told you when you left me
There's nothing to forgive
But I always thought you'd come back, tell me all you found was
Heartbreak and misery
It's hard for me to say, I'm jealous of the way
You're happy without me
I'm jealous of the nights
That I don't spend with you
I'm wondering who you lay next to
Oh, I'm jealous of the nights
I'm jealous of the love
Love that wasn't here
Gone for someone else to share
Oh, I'm jealous of the love, cause
[Chorus:]
I wished you the best of
All this world could give
And I told you when you left me
There's nothing to forgive
But I always thought you'd come back, tell me all you found was
Heartbreak and misery
It's hard for me to say, I'm jealous of the way
You're happy without me
As I sink
In the sand
Watch you slip
Through my hands
Oh, as I die here another day
Cause all I do is cry behind this smile
[Chorus:]
I wished you the best of
All this world could give
And I told you when you left me
There's nothing to forgive
But I always thought you'd come back, tell me all you found was
Heartbreak and misery
It's hard for me to say, I'm jealous of the way
You're happy without me
It's hard for me to say, I'm jealous of the way
You're happy without me
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A degree of selfishness.....
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Posted:Jan 19, 2016 6:16 am
Last Updated:May 8, 2018 10:26 pm
7795 Views
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Love requires sacrifice. Always.
Do you think that is a true statement?
Sacrifice: to give up something that is valuable to you in order to help another person.
I won't be the first to admit it - I love being in love. It is such a high to see my beloved first thing in the morning. The whole night has passed without my eyes and mind taking her in, that the first glimpse of her and I feel like a parachutist eagerly looking out of the plane on his first jump - an adrenaline rush.
Breakfast will be prepared, showers taken, clothes changed, off to work. 10-12 hour work days, back in the evening, freshen up, prepare dinner together, retire to love-making etc etc etc.....
I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that the entire day is spent without any think or thought of "sacrifice". Right? I mean, isn't that how being together usually works?
You get love, you give love, you do errands for each other without murmur, etc etc.
You don't do all that stuff to avoid quarrels, or keep track of showmanship or one-up-man-ship, right? You do it because you just do. It is the right thing to do, and it's perhaps we have seen our parents act/live out, or seen it on the telly.
So when does the "sacrifice" part come in? What is it called when you are giving up something valuable of yours so that the person you love can have what they want in your place? And how many times do you have to sacrifice? When do you find yourself keeping track of all the debits and credits? What do you feel when you sacrifice? What do you feel when you realise that you are the one who is usually doing the sacrificing? When will you start to miss your "something valuable"? Will you do anything about it then?
Will you realise that there is a degree of selfishness in this equation?
Not that your significant other has been getting their way more and more than ever. Not that your "something valuable" seems to be insignificant in the eyes of others.
But that you are the guilty party.
That you are the one to be blamed for giving up your "something valuable".
That you are the selfish one; selfish because you are afraid of upsetting the balance - so you "sacrifice". You give in. Until it becomes more frequent. Your selfishness for the apparent normalcy heightens your degree of selfishness in wanting to not just prolong the relationship but to also delay the possibility of the now inevitable final act.
Sure, it always takes two hands to clap. But, BUT, it only takes a spark to start a forest fire; it doesn't take a forest fire to beget another forest fire.
So, if there is sacrifice, is it still love? If something valuable is given up more by one party than the other to preserve the peace (or for whatever reason), is it still love?
Or are they cracks in the mirror/ceiling/relationship? If they are cracks, and can be fixed, will they be fixed? Should they be fixed? And what happens when another crack opens up? Does that become a fault line? What if it does?
So if you get lots of such cracks, or you give up something valuable often, would you still continue? It's become a one-way street, or often is. When do start questioning if this is love or not?
When do you start planning for the future? When does your degree of selfishness become so acute that you question your own reasons?
So. Then. There cannot be such a thing as love. It is a smoky illusion fed to us by romantics and what-nots. There is only lust, partnership, accommodation, keeping of accounts, pre-nups, nsa, etc etc.
There is a new version of love, isn't there....
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If you love somebody.... by Sting....
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Posted:Jan 18, 2016 5:41 am
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2024 8:45 pm
7285 Views
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"If You Love Somebody Set Them Free"
If you need somebody, call my name
If you want someone, you can do the same
If you want to keep something precious
You got to lock it up and throw away the key
If you want to hold onto your possession
Don't even think about me
If you love somebody, set them free
If it's a mirror you want, just look into my eyes
Or a whipping boy, someone to despise
Or a prisoner in the dark
Tied up in chains you just can't see
Or a beast in a gilded cage
That's all some people ever want to be
If you love somebody, set them free
You can't control an independent heart
Can't tear the one you love apart
Forever conditioned to believe that we can't live
We can't live here and be happy with less
So many riches, so many souls
Everything we see we want to possess
If you need somebody, call my name
If you want someone, you can do the same
If you want to keep something precious
You got to lock it up and throw away the key
If you want to hold onto your possession
Don't even think about me
If you love somebody, set them free
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I thought I knew what love.....
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Posted:Jan 18, 2016 4:48 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2016 8:18 pm
7380 Views
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So... what is love?
I thought I did love her. No. I am sure I did love her. No. Sorry. I am sure I love her. The fact that she's no longer around is besides the point.
Ha, f*rkin, ha!
Yeah, I do miss her. But the issue I have is: I thought she loved me too.
No. I mean, didn't she love me? Too?
She did not say it as often as I did. I did notice that. Was that a sign?
We made love everywhere. Day, night, dusk, dawn, car, car park, mall toilets, mall changing rooms, at the office, in the storeroom, with condom, mostly without condom, etc etc.... Wasn't that a sign?
She was with me for more than ten years. Wasn't that another sign?
We made love way above the national average. Was that a sign?
That's, perhaps, the thing: it seemed hunky-dory from my end. But not just me - even my pals and even her cousin who intro'd us, all were surprised at her unexpected/abrupt exit.
I enjoyed our conversations, and it did look like she enjoyed them too. We would about everything under the sun. I thought that was a good sign.
I thought I knew her. I thought I knew what love was. I thought I was in it. Now that I am not in it, naturally I am second-guessing all there is. Do I have to understand that there was advanced planning going on from her end?
So, yeah, I am confused/pissed/angry. Understandable, to some extent, right? But here's the thing: I should know that nothing lasts forever. I should. That we were two individuals. That perhaps I could have been the one walking away from it all one fine day instead of her (nahh, I wouldn't do it - it's not in me to be disloyal). I should know that we all have our free will, right?
I should learn to let go, right? I mean, even Sting sang it loud and clear, "If you love someone, set them free...."
If she was meant to be with me, she'd come back. Right?
So I ask myself - what did she lack when she was with me? I mean, surely one lacks something and that is why one walks away when one is not getting "it". Right?
Ahhh... I think I get it now.
What she could not get from me, she thought she could get from another.
What she was getting from me, she thought it was run-of-the-mill stuff.
Perhaps it was all lined up by her for quite some time, and she was just waiting for the perfect moment to spring.
Sigh..... How do you look at someone you love and tell yourself it's time to walk away?
I thought I knew what love is/was.....
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Love.....
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Posted:Jan 17, 2016 4:41 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2016 8:18 pm
7355 Views
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This still perplexes me: is there such a thing as real/true love? Would we know when we see it? How long would it take for us to recognize it? How long would we have it in our lives? Would we always think it would end sooner or later?
It's seems to me that for most of that are here that we kind of feel/know that true love is almost an urban myth. We don't expect it, and if it does strike us, we would feel/question it's longevity.
It's gotten to a point that we have to "purchase" these moments of love in order to get a glimpse/taste of perhaps what could be. Don't get me wrong - I mean no disrespect for anybody. In fact, I am in the same boat myself.
But, you know, just thinking out loud.....
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Sapiosexually speaking, Madam Curie must be the peak!
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Posted:Jan 14, 2016 4:36 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2016 8:16 pm
7727 Views
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I've been seeing that word quite a bit on this and other places. I found this over the web:
A shibboleth used by poseurs attracted to the appearance of intelligence rather than actual intelligence. People genuinely attracted to intelligence know that the word “intelligence” is derived from the Latin “intelligere”; that the Latin participle for wisdom is “sapiens,” not “sapio”; and that the Latin “sapio” means something that tastes good. It also means "rotten" in Greek, methinks.
LOL.... I haven't re-checked it, but if the facts are true, then ha ha ha....
Do I like intelligent women? First of all, I think there is quite a bit of intelligence in all of us, and it's perhaps one of the many factors that have to be in alignment before I would find the person opposite attractive.
Sometimes, the intelligence we are looking for depends on the location we are at. For example, what kind of intelligence will turn us on at a pub/bar on a Friday/Saturday night? Or, what level of intelligence attracts us when we want to engage a lawyer?
So, different location, different sort of intelligence takes the cake, right?
Am I wrong/correct to think that the fairer sex also have these same intelligence requirements/standards when they look at us men?
Sometimes I feel that intelligence cannot really be reliably understood or measured. Not referring to IQ tests here. But confidence, that is something which I find it easier to recognize; though by no means does that imply that confidence is always existent 24/7/365 in anyone.
And it takes time for me to measure that confidence - I have to see it at work, at play, at rest. That's when intelligence is also revealed to quite some extent. And a few other attributes also become apparent.
I think it is safe to say that we form initial opinions about others within the first few minutes of communication, though this is likely to change.
For me, I like the discovery period. I like having taken the time to understand someone. The front/back page/cover may attract, but it's what's in-between that keeps me interested/engrossed/coming back for more..
The only question now is - how much time do we have to get to know one another?
Lol....
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Looking to love..... Again......
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Posted:Jan 11, 2016 8:55 pm
Last Updated:Jan 14, 2016 3:07 am
7355 Views
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So..... She and I.... we've parted....
I'd been with her for the last ten years, and she decided to break herself off from us coz she wanted to have a and I just couldn't see it in her destiny..... I know, strange words to say, but believe me when I say I have weighed and measured each word carefully before penning it.
Is there such a thing as being able to divine/see destiny? Do I believe in palmistry? Yes on both counts for me. Do I trust my readings?
To answer that:
I remember Dune, about how the protagonist became able to foretell the future and see his destiny, but chose not to see it or divine it. He had done it before, and experience told him that he would rather let things happen as they would otherwise life would become too predictable and boring; not the kind of life he wanted to lead.
So, he could if he wanted to, but didn't.
In a way, my thinking is like that too. I can't be sure I'll be any accurate, so I'd rather not. But on the occasions that I have, I have not been wrong yet.
Hence my apprehensions about her having . Not saying she would be a bad mother, but the risks involved in pregnancy made me feel she would be risking her life and not just that of the . Crazy for me to think that way, right?
Enough of that for now; there is so much that can be said - ten years worth... lol.... She might return, who knows? Perhaps one day she'll feel confidence (in her, in me) and communicate again.... Till then....
Good stuff - I will cherish and remember every moment.... I'm the romantic sort after all.... ha ha....
SO.... alone again.... and some may say it's a tribute to her when I say that I would like once again to have that which I have been missing for the last couple of months...
Someone to cuddle up to under the sheets....
Someone to have our skins and flesh pressed together with....
Someone to have conversations with to discover a beautiful mind...
Someone to fly to heaven with every night...
Someone.....
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Attributes which catch my eye....
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Posted:Jul 3, 2013 1:43 am
Last Updated:Nov 5, 2015 12:10 am
12246 Views
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Maybe this is not very pc and all, but in a place such as this I've seen darn near everyone stating a preference for the types of folks which they feel attracted to , and some even state the types which they will simply not entertain.
I thought I'd list some of the attributes which turn me on... 
a. Fair skin... the whiter the skin is, the more I find myself attracted;
b. Eyes... I've noticed quite a few girls have mischievous eyes, almost as if there was a fire element within, definitely sexy;
c. Smile... A sweet smile can be quite alluring, especially at the right moments;
d. Legs... I tend to like legs which have some flesh on them, and not those at either ends of the spectrum. kinda love it when they can fill out jeans or how they look firm and leggy under skirts;
e. Voice/laughter... Audio supplements and can be just as comforting as a mothers voice is to a babe;
f. Interests... it turns me on when she's got stuff to do which is interesting and perhaps even has hobbies which indicates to me an active mind and lifestyle;
g. Attitude... there's definitely a lot of charm in the way she carries herself and how she acts/reacts, confidence in-born is attractive;
h. Occupation... that she's self-sustaining, and uses her mind/brain assets in her chosen field, is a turn-on for me.
Lol... picky aren't I? 
I can't really say which particular attribute stands higher over others. I know I cannot expect a perfect score on every attribute I've listed above; there's no such thing as a perfect female specimen, right?
But I've seen quite a few gorgeous university girls which tick the physical attributes, and I've felt myself wanting to talk to them to see what they've been studying etc.
Quite a lot of office girls catch my eye too, and the confidence they exhibit is quite catching.
Lol... Maybe one of these days, right?
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Gun thoughts
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Posted:Dec 18, 2012 10:39 pm
Last Updated:Jan 18, 2016 2:31 am
16749 Views
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If there ever was a better time to pen some of my thoughts on guns......
1. The simplistic view is that I am not for any form of guns being available to the public at large.
2. Guns have always appeared to me as a form of oneupmanship. Kinda like how we "venerate" the biggus dickus on campus; we all wanna have the "power"...
3. Sure, guns don't kill people, people kill people. Puhleeeze! Would the outcome have been the same if knives were used rather than guns? Again, simplistically, no; I'd like to think that fewer lives might have been lost.
4. But I can understand that there might be circumstances and instances where pro-gun might be alright too. Plus the folks who are pro-2nd Amendment. Ok. Fine. But how do you propose to ensure that these same guns do not fall into the hands of the undesirables? Locking the guns at home may be the answer for some, but what if these too are taken by someone deranged or mentally-unstable?
5. What if the gun-owner himself/herself becomes unhinged? What safety for the family or public then?
6. Granted, there cannot really be any meaningful answers to these thoughts/questions without infringing on the rights and freedoms of one or all sides. But I guess maybe that's what accommodations and compromises are all about; both sides give up some things in exchange for some other things.....
7. I'm sure if there was a way to ensure that these guns do not fall into the wrong hands, all sides would be happy to conform.
8. One suggestion I have would be to have an active register at all police stations, whereby the police will have to do not just a background check on the gun-owner, but that this check is done twice a year before a renewal is granted yearly.
9. Random visits to check on the safety of where the guns are kept to be conducted yearly.
10. All members of the house, and their neighbours, to be vetted prior to issue of gun permit.
11. Maybe these measures sound high-handed, but then I can't think of others as yet; I'm sure many out there would have better ideas.
Sigh..... I'm really horrified about the loss of young and innocent lives in Newtown, and on campuses over the decade or so... Surely we can do something to try and prevent it from happening again?
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