Privacy is a really big deal.
|
Posted:Sep 17, 2017 12:28 am
Last Updated:Oct 8, 2017 1:34 am
2411 Views
|
I've only been on Polyamory Date for about a week, and I take all the standard precautions. I make sure to leave my face out of my photos (my mouth can be seen in some but that's it) and I have no tattoos or other identifiable body markings. I haven't sent a single person on this site a picture of my face. And it doesn't matter, because someone recognized me anyway and just messaged me, calling me by my real name and asking if I'd like to hook up.
It goes without saying that the vast majority of us on Polyamory Date are not particularly keen to be identified by anyone we don't choose to divulge that information to, especially women since we're judged much more harshly for being openly sexual creatures, even in liberal Seattle. While there is no true privacy on the internet, Polyamory Date represents a kind of limited safe space for free sexual expression. While the specific person who contacted me is probably not mean-spirited enough to be a serious threat to my privacy, I feel like he breached an unspoken rule by contacting me and calling me by name. He has no reason to contact me here - he follows my various social media accounts and comments there somewhat regularly. And obviously if I had any sexual interest in him he'd already be aware. For him to contact me on here was just really fucking gross; it felt like an invasion of privacy, like we shared some dirty secret together...only it wasn't one I ever wanted to share with him.
It's probably impossible to be completely anonymous on Polyamory Date if you're even moderately well known in other circles. But if you recognize me - or anyone else that is clearly desirous of maintaining their privacy - DON'T consider that knowledge some kind of an "in", or use it as an opportunity to intersect their public and private lives against their will. There is no scenario in which "hey I follow your normal Twitter, so-and-so, how is work going, btw you've got a great vagina!" is ever going to be anything other than completely awful.
Respect other people's privacy and try and show a little ethical decency, please. This place is no fun if I constantly feel like I have to look over my shoulder and worry about being here.
(note: that user was immediately blocked, and most of my pictures were moved into a friends-only album...lame, but obviously necessary)
|
|
11
Comments
|
|