Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > Jadzia11 > My Blog |
Re-Evaluation
|
Re-Evaluation Sometimes stepping back from a situation will allow me to put into perspective. I have recently had to do this. I did some self-searching and came to some personal realizations. This, I do not think is an easy thing for anyone. I know for me, facing the truth about myself is not always pleasant. But because of this re-evaluation of myself and my situation, I am making changes (hopefully for the better). I am setting goals and working towards them. I have accomplished one so far. There are a few others that are going to take more time and determination. I am not perfect by any means, but I try to live a generally good life. I try to be polite, kind and have a smile available for anyone who needs it. That's not to say that I am naive, I do my best not to let anyone take advantage of me. I like to think that I am pretty level headed and a fair judge of people in general. But like everyone, I make mistakes. The one that has recently affected my life, was letting myself believe in someone who was not being honest with me or even himself in the end. I started to develop trust in him and he betrayed that. I do not trust easily, I am always cautious, but after months of cultivating a friendship, it all came crashing down in one quick minute. Not going to deny that I was hurt by this break in trust. Would we be human if it did not hurt us on some level? We are emotional creatures (to varying degrees) after all. The hurt petulant in me wanted to shut down and deny everyone and everything in the world. If I let nothing in, nothing can hurt me. The grown ass adult knows better. The rebellious just wants to lash out at the person that hurt me and make them hurt just as much or more. Again the adult in me quells that urge and allows the reasonable side to surface. At that point, I decided to step back and see where I needed to go from there. This led to several weeks of looking into my personal mirror and seeing if I actually like what was being reflected back to the world. I did not! Or at least not everything. I know anything I do cannot change another person or their feelings towards me. But I am doing this for me and not anyone else. I want a better version of me to show the world. I want a happier me, so when I sit alone with the Id, the Ego and the Superego I can be satisfied that I have done my best that I can. So as my journey continues I strive to make myself and my tiny little corner of the world a better place for anyone who happens to stop by and says hello. The colors I paint my life will never appeal to everyone, but if I can make even one passing soul nod and smile as they go, then it was a good day. |
|||
|
happening by and sending a smile  I can soooo relate to your situation, girl! my lil corner gets darker as the walls close in... but I will always know theres a light out there waiting to shine. u made me smile today the sweetness of cream the PERKiness of caffeine the ambrosia-like elixir of.... Coffee~w/Baileys
|
Become a member to create a blog
