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| Blogs > rdx37 > Rambles; Crazy posts. |
What I want
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What I want I think we all want the same thing. Isn't that right? The problems arise when we define our own lives, and how we want them to be lived- our sensibilities are so different. We all want someone who shares our basic world view. Someone who will recognize our weakness, and fill in with their own strength. In a word, a complement. "Nice Rack." No, not that kind of complement. That one usually gets you slapped (depending on the locality). Must be tactful! The brain has two hemispheres. In the Ayurvedic lifestyle, the two halves are thought of as male and female. Men and women are naturally better than each other regarding specific aspects of life. I'm not going to go into it here, go read yourself some books. The fact is, that we can not be totally independent. This would see the human race become completely extinct. Some humans actively work to achieve this goal. For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to be my dad. I intend to fully make that transition some day- with someone who believes and wants the same things I do (not 100%, that'd be boring, but at least a 70  .A good woman is like a good man. Each will have strengths and weaknesses. We ought to be able to recognize our biggest strengths and play to them, while isolating our weaknesses and improving upon them. From this, we form cohesiveness, and become a well regulated machine. What kind of machine? That depends on you and yours. Due to the nature of our individuality, and the structure of our culture in regards to government and economic success- we are free to pursue our own paths if we can dream them up. I'd like to own my own house, have a wife and a good number of , dogs, chickens, with some decent land for self sustaining (or at least very high percent of supplementation) vegetables. I will always be an entrepreneur (every single fckin time I need to look that word up, I can not spell that word.), and I'll probably not work for anyone else unless the incentives move me. I will be building my original business, expanding it's scope, as well as starting out in several new industries. I've got a thousand ideas, most of which will fail, but failure is my good friend. Like learning to take a physical fall to lessen the damage, learning to fail is important. I want someone who is as much a failure as I am. Out of the ashes rises the Phoenix, no? Man this post is totally rambling. Well you knew what you were getting! I am moving out of my home state of NJ this year (2016), and relocating. I won't say where, but it's a huge change. No more North East for this guy. This is a decision I have come to over the past several years, and have finally pinpointed my jump date. I want to live in a less densely populated area. My skill set is pretty varied, so I will be able to find work wherever I go (I make it myself). I think the women in my soon to be adopted city will be more along the lines of what I want to do with my life. I am not a fan of NYC, and people who are enamored with it immediately repel me. So much for women around me in this area. Everyone loooooves the city. Oh the city! It's so grand! Sure that's an unfair generalization- I've known women here who hate cities like I do. They were smarter than I and moved away sooner. So I want some good sex! Yet I don't want to look for it IRL?? Jeez, I must be wacked out or something. Wait, that's not true, I am always (always) looking at girls. I love flirting. I went to the PA farm show in Harrisburg a couple weekends ago (only spent one day, work schedule)- and my favorite part? Flirting with the help kiosk girls. There was someone asking questions in front of us, and then it was our turn. The Exchange: Man in front: Do I pay for these? Nice lady: No, the maps and all this stuff is complementary! Man: Oh thank you! *takes map, walks away* now it's our turn. Nice lady: What can I get you? Me: We just need a map, but I'll take any other complements you're willing to give me! *smiles all around* Nice lady 2: Well, I like green- so I like your shirt! Nice lady: ..And I've got a thing for glasses, so there ya go! Me: Why thank you so much! Have a great day! and we were on our way, with myself beaming and radiant from such a lovely and innocent exchange. Aaaanyway, this leads me back to why I'm here again on Polyamory Date. Like I said up there- I want sex! (shock!) I also want a serious relationship- to get married, have , and really build my life up around me with a woman who shares my vision. BUT- I'm moving in six months! I can't look for a serious relationship when I'm going to literally uproot my life and rebuild it in a different state, from SCRATCH. That's right. I am going to try and sell off my to a suitable replacement, but there is no guarantee that will happen. I LIVE FAST AND LOOSE, MAN. That's not true. I live slow and tight. Although sometimes you want to be fast and tight, like a metal drummer. double bass! dugga dugga dugga dugga I call it relationship purgatory, or limbo. I can't move forward or backward, I can only look for non-committed hookups. And when I do come across someone who I think maybe I'd like to be more serious about, I ran the other way... FUCK!!! It's just a bad time for that. I have my life vision, and I need to do a basic reboot before I can start playing the game again. End it with a poem? OK! So I slashed the ties and cut the rope of my thirty first long years I watched them drift away through time With my only sadness shears* The life I'd known, the bonds I'd grown They withered, without me- died Flower's petals drop on dust No water, is no life ------------- *Sadness shears are special scissors designed to cut away woes. Yes, I made them up. |
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