23913 posts 12/26/2012 6:24 am
Last Read:
12/26/2012 1:30 pm
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Some Jokes
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0 Comments 6 These questions about Canada were posted on an international tourism website and obviously the answers came from a fellow Canuck.
Q: I have never seen it warm on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only six thousand km, take lots of water. . .
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)!
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed beaver. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North . . . oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: No, WE don't stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q: Can I wear high heels in Canada? (UK)
A: You are an American politician, right?
Q: Can you tell me the regions on British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter gatherers. Milk is illegal.
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Canada who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: All Canadian rattle snakes are perfectly harmless, and can be safely handled and make good pets.
Q: I was in Canada in 1969 on R&R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Surrey, BC. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
Read more: http://Polyamory Date.com#ixzz2GASYD5Aj
To help you laugh off the Xmas turkey. Hope every one had a good one.
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This is not meant to offend any one in any way.
 
  
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50414 posts 12/26/2012 1:30 pm |
Quoting sexysixties2:
So there are no stuffed beavers in Canada?....there must be a lot of frustrated beaver around then!
Oh love I knew you say something like that. You are on the naughty list again for next year.
I just meant you can not kill them and stuff them. They are on are 5 cent coin. They are a protected species here. They are our national animal.
This is not meant to offend any one in any way.
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50414 posts 12/26/2012 1:27 pm |
Quoting BeccaLuvs:
Just the 'great' things some people will say?!  Or ask? So I won't ask!
LOL You can if you want.
This is not meant to offend any one in any way.
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39750 posts 12/26/2012 1:00 pm |
So there are no stuffed beavers in Canada?....there must be a lot of frustrated beaver around then!
"Age does not protect you from love, but love, to some extent, protects you from age."
~~Anais Nin~~
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20895 posts 12/26/2012 12:45 pm |
Just the 'great' things some people will say?! Or ask? So I won't ask!
..... And always 'hold onto all those sexy thoughts'! (Remember if you feel like taking part in some sexy fun then click here!) Come on Some Sketch FunAnd Now How About 39Me39 Watching 39You39 If you39d like that Please Comment - So if you would like - click here as well!
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50414 posts 12/26/2012 9:45 am |
Quoting justskin1:
Like those questions deserved serious answers. I thought the answers given were rather restrained.
yes they were lol
This is not meant to offend any one in any way.
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13175 posts 12/26/2012 9:23 am |
Like those questions deserved serious answers. I thought the answers given were rather restrained.
If you see me in the real world, come say "Hi Justskin."
I always behave. Preferably not well.
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50414 posts 12/26/2012 8:48 am |
LOL Our ski team is called the crazy canucks.
They don't win much they drink too much.
Did you ever get some snow?? We got lots and it is cold as hell -24 below.
This is not meant to offend any one in any way.
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