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Blogs > im_soaking_wet > Sessions with Soaking |
Decisions, Descisions
Decisions, Descisions |
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Something to ponder for sure. My take is you have to decide what you can live with and without. I know there is the elusive all encompassing person for everyone, but from my vast experience (haha) that is a very tall order. and you end up with someone that is good in many area's but probably not all areas. Being in my position, I agree, sexual desire is not going to go away, so that is top of list and assuming you are attracted to the person, and you get along and you have somewhat similar goals/dreams/desires, then you have a basis to move forward on. Or just keep doing same with "similar" profiles on all sites you use. You may have to just find a way to weed out the unwanted attention... As I am sure you will have a continued full inbox.... That's it for now.. Good luck! You deserve the life you desire...
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Why can't you have the same profile on both sites, and omit the sexy stuff from the vanilla site profile? I certainly understand not wanting to share something with a particular widespread demographics, you will never interact with. But certainly if you like threesomes and DP, be honest, put the 800 pound gorilla on the table A.S.A.P., so that it is no lurking menacingly over your shoulder. If your partner is going to be cool with it, or not, telling him sooner rater than later will make no difference. Where does it say your ultimate partner needs to be your equal on all fronts, including financial? And if you find someone who is significantly better off financially... that would be ok, right? Don't play the double standard card, it only makes your end goal more difficult, unless improving your financials is your top priority. Besides, do you really want to date someone who is a carbon copy of yourself? IMHO, if you do, then there is no need for a partner, just a house full or mirrors. Is the goal not to find someone who complements you, so that together, you are more than the sum of the two parts? Find pleasure in giving pleasure
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Personally, I have separated the two out. Its easy for you to say something a little freaky on a vanilla profile that I can't do, women will just think I'm after sex. If you say it, guys will just find you interesting and email you. On the vanilla site, I lucked out and found someone who loved dick as much as I loved pussy, and it worked for awhile....until I found out she was nuts. I guess women can figure out that I'm a little freaky quite quickly when we talk no matter where I meet them from? Then again, I have found love on a_f_f too. It was just from normal talking without pressure to meet, and I fell for her. Now, I'm not exactly looking for that from this place, but if its right and its good, then why would you turn them down? You can meet people here just as easily as at a bar or a library. It doesn't matter how you meet them so long as you can communicate, and that's independent of how soon you have sex with someone. If a girl gives it to me on the first date I'm not going to decide not to date her because she was easier than others, I'll decide not to date her because I saw something about her that I know I couldn't live with long-term. If you want to ask about success, then definitely I have had more from here in finding relationships than the vanilla site. I wish it were the opposite, maybe I'd be happier, and maybe I wouldn't be here at all. Now the trick is finding one again from there, or here. Aut viam inveniam aut faciam Tips for Guys to Meet Women Things i miss most about relationships
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If you are looking to date then be upfront about that on here if you want to. You can meet guys just for kicks and if something more develops then cool. At least then maybe some of the flakier fellas will be weeded out as they will probably have not read your profile at all. Starting a vanilla profile elsewhere will probably lead to some problems if the person you meet is great, but not sexually compatible. Can always mention you like partners that are experimental or open to trying things, see if that helps at all. Just be upfront. You're a wicked lady, why beat around the bush?
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So if you don't want two profiles just give it a whirl on here saying you want to date. If it doesn't work, no harm done. You're a catch for any guy! As for the bush thing, you know what I meant! You know me though, always willing to help with quality control!
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You know what? There are a lot of people on Polyamory Date looking for relationships. I, personally, am here because the dating sites just do not provide anything compatible for me. And to get to sex with people from those sites is so convoluted--plus, often not satisfying. It's obviously going to be a personal preference and a matter of how you build relationships, but a relationship generally does not come right away and could be built with someone on this site. And if you really want someone who is open to the things you are open to, you may be better off here. ...Just don't expect that a relationship will start up right away! Some people relate better to others once they've had sex--and some men will feel closer to you when you have a sexual relationship. The last thing you want is to go to a vanilla site and find someone who seems amazing and find that sex somehow makes him lose respect for you. In a sex-negative society, there certainly are people who feel that way... But there are also men who respect women who are open about their sexuality and with whom it isn't a big drawn out game to get to--especially as we age and spend a lot of time working... That can just be exhausting when we have lots of responsibilities and little time. Those are my rambling and not-well-though-out ideas on the subject... la la la... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[blog rachelck] Invisible Ink~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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So you are looking for someone that is financially independant and can afford to take one or two nice vacations a year and enjoys fine dining. That might cover the balance sheet side of things. Of course, you will know shortly after you meet them. As for the profiles, I voted for scenario 1. Simply because it seems that is what you want. As you say, you will probably find a lot of people from Polyamory Date on other sites, but it may be that you won't find vanilla people on Polyamory Date. If you truly want someone that is open-minded, I think your chances are greater here than there. Of course what do I know. You can always put up a profile on a vanilla site and cast a wider net. Be suggestive in your wording and see what you catch. You will still get a lot of responses, it's just a matter of filtering them.
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I choosed cenario 2 . Kisses
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