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There's a spider in your face right now (probably)
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There's a spider in your face right now (probably) Can you guess which of the following is not a scientific fact ? A. There is an insectlike parasite in nature that crawls into another creature's mouth , eats its tongue , then replaces the tongue with its own body , so that the host creature continues to live and eat , never realizing the parasite is there . B. A different microscopic parasite is responsible for nearly half of all human deaths since the Stone Age . C. There is a brain parasite that lives in mammals and alters their behavior . Up to 3 billion humans carry this parasite . D. When musicians play an instrument and miss a beat (because a finger slips , or they're a half-second slow , etc), there is a secret pattern to their misses , as if all humans are subconsciously playing a hidden song with their "mistakes" . E. A rugby player in England broke his neck during practice and suffered a stroke as a result . When he woke up in the hospital , he was suddenly gay . The gag is , of course , that all of these facts are true . The fact that there's roughly a 50% chance that a parasite effects my behavior brings back an age old question I ponder a lot . If you found out some aspect of your personality , or your whole personality , was the result of something tangible (like magic pants) what would that mean ? If someone told you tomorrow "Hey person who read's 40's blog , if you stop eating bananas the aspect of your personality you like the least will go away - but some other random stuff will too" would you do it ? I know this seems strange from someone who occasionally visits a therapist but I like the way I am - warts and low self esteem and jerkyness and all . Aren't our flaws and foibles as much of what makes us us as anything ? Also , did you know that police officer's aren't afforded any rights under the 5th Amendment ? If you're a police (wo)man and you're under suspicion you do not have the right to an attorney and you ARE expected to testify against your own interest . Kind of makes sense , but kind of weird too . I think that should apply to all elected government officials . In other news , I was in a different state recently and there happened to be a story on the news about the "Immigration Crisis" in Iowa . Since I was unaware of any such crisis I was intrigued . The story claimed that a lot of Cuban immigrants were coming to Iowa and the locals (ie white folk) were none to happy about that . One guy they interviewed made a statement about all the different parasites farmers have to deal with and then said "but the Cubans are the worst parasite" . Ouch . Here's the trick though , there might be a Cuban guy somewhere in Iowa , but most of the people coming here are from Mexico or Central America . Also , aside from my uncle no one really cares . Bonus fact - one time my uncle told me (in regards to relationship problems) "Women are for night time" , now that's advice you can use ! Also that Cuban parasite line seemed familiar so I looked around on the interwebs and sure enough that was lifted straight from a newscast in Florida . So basically the whole story was BS . I stopped watching the news regularly a long time ago , when did they just start wholly fabricating stories ? Makes me wonder what lies I've seen on my local news about other states . Are there really cougars in California or is it all a scam ? In other other news recently a comely young lass was bemoaning the fact that my profile pic is woefully out of date(I'm much better looking in person apparently) and she mentioned that I should have a pic where you can see my eyes because they are "breathtaking" . Which is true , but as we all know the eyes are the windows to the soul and I don't need you pervs looking at my soul . And now , an anecdote from work . This morning I was shocked and appalled to see a new lady in my department wearing a skirt WAY above the knee . As the self appointed code enforcer for the floor I had no choice but to remark to her "This isn't a burlesque show lady , cover your legs !" Turns out she actually is a burlesque dancer (or whatever they're called) in her spare time under the stage name Phoenix L'Amore who often does shows with local musicman Little Ruckus (who is awesome) . Small world . Would you go see a co-workers of yours perform in a burlesque show or some kind of striptease ? Random topics complete ! Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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I can only think of one co-worker who I would want to see doing a striptease. The officemates are mostly elderly, like I am. A local bar had "strip karaoke" where amateurs could go up on stage and do a burlesque dance. I thought it was a fun concept, but there were few volunteers. And *I* sure wasn't going to volunteer.   
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I saw an on-line news article about the brain parasite too. The one I saw said that the parasite was most common among the French. {really} At work one guys niece was hired as a temp. She also worked as a stripper. She worked third shift and sometimes still had glitter on her face. A couple of years ago, there was a very large raid in Postville. ICE cops arrested 300 illegal workers. In the Waterloo/Cedar Falls metro area {where I live} there are about 4000 Bosnians. {that's what the local paper said in an article about immigrants.} I've never understood why they came to Iowa. It's not like Bosnia. If the Aswan Dam was completely blocked, would Egypt be in a state of De-Nile? From the title I thought you might mention how many spiders the average person eats in their sleep. Crosswords increase your vocabulary. Cross words increase your blood pressure.
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I saw an on-line news article about the brain parasite too. The one I saw said that the parasite was most common among the French. {really} At work one guys niece was hired as a temp. She also worked as a stripper. She worked third shift and sometimes still had glitter on her face. A couple of years ago, there was a very large raid in Postville. ICE cops arrested 300 illegal workers. In the Waterloo/Cedar Falls metro area {where I live} there are about 4000 Bosnians. {that's what the local paper said in an article about immigrants.} I've never understood why they came to Iowa. It's not like Bosnia. If the Aswan Dam was completely blocked, would Egypt be in a state of De-Nile? From the title I thought you might mention how many spiders the average person eats in their sleep. Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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I think I'm too fat though One time on the TV they had some young dudes go into a bar to find the skankiest cougar they could get to come home with them . It was super sad . I'm all for banging mature ladies , but come on , at some point in your life have a little dignity . Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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Aren't all cats schizophrenic ? Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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